Friday, 31 January 2020

Girls And Women Who Shaped My Last Decade





First, gratitude to GOD for giving me life, to exist in exuberance and abundance. The idea to write this blog is inspired by series of  my interactions with girls and women, over the last decade, who gradually molded me into what I am today. Do not get into the notion that this read is about a womanizer.  Rather, this is about transformation of a self centered, introvert boy to a more sensible and matured man. I have tried my level best to stay candid as I write. 

As I entered the last decade: 


She was my first, approachable crush, my college mate. I always admire intelligence in my opposite sex. She was an add-on with beauty and simplicity. I had fallen for her. Though we had namesake  conversation but whatever we had, would inspire me. 

Then, an introvert me, didn't know what would make a girl happy. I thought to trade off intelligence with intelligence to wow her. It was a failed attempt because of my average intellect (you can make out from my strategy itself, how smart I was πŸ˜„). Four years passed and I couldn't confess her about my feelings.It was year 2010, beginning of last decade, one day, we interacted over instant messenger. I drew the courage to write, "I like you". She was silent for a moment but handled my nervousness well. She was a strong girl. 

My "I like you" never converted to "I love you". One day, she openly gave me a hint of proposal, may be realizing my helplessness to confess. Coward me! backed off, cutting off connections with her to satisfy my false ego. Today, I want to say sorry to her but she is cold. May be that is the best way she can treat me!!!                      

Guys ! If this gets poignant, cheer up πŸ‘. I have lots of fun stored in my post as well !! 

The Real Love:


It takes time. It builds, layer after layer, on memories. This I learnt when I met a girl, now my wife Malvika, in 2012, with whom I have spent almost 8 years. This was the best gift the decade had offered me. A companion with whom I share all my nonsense. Many of you reading this, might be privileged to have better love story. I can proudly say we have a realistic one. 

We met through family alliance. In our first talk, I could sense she was emotionally very fragile and soft. It is this quality of her's which make me love her each day, even today. I know she needs my emotional warmth and I try my best to fulfill it. She, on the other hand is a perfectionist who take care of  all my unorganized mess. 

As time flew, every thing went well. We moved to US an year after our marriage. It was all hunky dory till 2016 when I suffered a delusional disorder - reason still unknown. It went undetected for 1 year. During the time I misjudged every thing around me, even Malvika. I became harsh to her, which is the only thing I want to change in my past. She, on the other hand, stood by me, cared for me. She concealed all her frustrations and nurtured our 2 years old daughter then, all alone.She gestured true selfless love- THE REAL LOVE. I owe my thanks to her.  

Now, after 8 years, Huh!! she controls me , directs me, irritates me, 😬 but she loves me !!     

The girl who changed everything in me:


26th March 2015, Irvine, USA, 8:27am, our doctor Gigi Kroll ,announced "Congratulations!! You have become parents". Malvika still lay on operation bed chanting her mantras and the doctor handed me a new born angel, Ayantika, my daughter. Her innocent eyes were untainted and I sensed her trust in my arms. Her tender hands and feet were swaddled. It was a momentous transformation from a freak to a father.  A miracle, I witnessed.

From,the day, till today I am maturing with her as she is growing.  It started with changing her diapers to dancing with her in school on Father's Day, memories keep adding. Her faith in me is my strength. 

I can write endlessly about Ayantika. May be I will share an independent blog on her. Father daughter bonding.

Below the Belt:


Men will be men. True is the case with me as well. My adventure streak took me to an adult bar on last day before I left USA in 2017. India calling. It was a treat to my eyes to what I saw there😡. Ladies in leather bra & g-string, studded set, were pole dancing. I galloped two shots of vodka and a beer to bring out audacity in my personality and be one with the place - sensuous. 

A tap on my shoulder, "Need personal attention?". There stood a dazzling lady eye-lined  and with rouge on her face. The atmosphere and vodka made me lose senses. I moved my figures around her shoulder without her consent. "Be free ! no one minds here" she said. I was too bold and she was exceptionally gratifying. We shared our cozy space.

The cameo sketched is only special moments. The decade is a long time. There were very special female friends who helped me, guided and motivated me when needed. Please excuse if I didn't mention you. You all have special place in my life.   

     

“This post is a part of ‘DECADE Blog Hop’ #DecadeHop organised by #RRxMM Rashi Roy and Manas Mukul. The Event is sponsored by Glo and co-sponsored by Beyond The BoxWedding ClapThe Colaba Store and Sanity Daily in association with authors Piyusha Vir and Richa S Mukherjee”







111 comments:

  1. An idiosyncratic journey! I found your candidness uncanny! To come back again from a delusional disorder is a great achievement! Hope that you continue your pursuit of the sublime and the beautiful! Regards. Rohit Verma

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  2. I was looking if your Mom figured in this list.

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    1. writing about eternal and obvious in small space was difficult so skipped MOM

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  3. What a beautiful ode to the women in your life. You had me at the mention of your daughter. Daughters are truly special.
    The delusional disorder phase must have been harrowing. I'm amazed how honestly you have written about it.
    May the decade that follows give you wonderful moments

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  4. Sisterhoods are so crucial to who we become as women in life, I liked that you acknowledged this special bond.

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  5. Women play such an important part of everyone's life. It is great that you acknowledge that. May you meet many more inspirational women in the coming decade.

    Meena from balconysunrise.wordpress.com

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  6. You missed many πŸ˜‰πŸ˜‰ journey of a boy to men, with girls all around.you have a loving wife and daughter!!You took all the good notes from every one you met and that help you cross through the journey of your life. God Bless !!

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    1. Thanks Jyoti. Ya didn't pen a lot but with hit and trails I have learned "What women want"😊

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  7. Nice. A completely different perspective from the other posts. I am glad the women in your life have shaped your entity and you are grateful and acknowledging it here. All the best for the next one and in growing into your role as a father.

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  8. What a beautiful tribute. It was a lucid write up and loved reading it. You have beautifully brought out the shades of love. And I am awed with the patience and love of your wife.
    Stay Blessed, stay happy!
    Best Wishes.

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    1. Thanks Piya !! I have a new mentor in you. You are an equal part of this blog.

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  9. It's interesting to read your perspective towards girls and women. I salute to your wife for taking out you from a disorder. It takes it's of efforts and patience and I am glad you are appreciating her efforts. Daughters always share a beautiful bond with her father. I feel sometimes men should be come out from their male ego because girls also want some explanations and clarity for her. Best wishes to the future!

    Deepika Mishra

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  10. A very candid post indeed. Liked the fact that you chose to look at the past decade through the women in your life. Best wishes!

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  11. Yin and yang. They always need each other. Good you found the yang. Ruchi https://thevagabond.me

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  12. Great journey of your decade gone by, highs and lows come to test us, it’s good to see that how much your wife has taken care of you, during your tough days, your true acknowledgment and appreciation for her says it all. And yes so true daughters are the real blessings of our lives.

    Archana
    http://archusblog.com

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  13. Manaivi amavaithathellam iraivan kodutha varam 😜😜😜I am sorry I am translating it ok. Ek achi biwi paana ek ashirvaad hey. Treasure her and love her endlessly make a promise to God on that note. I know you will do that. Good luck and love to your little daughter.πŸ‘πŸ‘πŸ˜Š

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  14. Novemberschild (Romila)31 January 2020 at 23:09

    She controls me , directs me, irritates me, �� but she loves me !! - That's what true love is all about isnt it Amrendra? Got you through the blog hop we are doing together. It was so good to read you acknowledging women who shaped your decade. Wish you happy 2020 and the new decade.

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    1. True Romila ji. Totally agree. Thanks. Wish you as well very nice 2020 and new decade

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  15. My husband never wanted a daughter and when she was born he totally neglected our son. Daughters twist their dads around their pinky finger just like urs did.Great tribute to the women in ur life.

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  16. I liked your idea of acknowledging the women in your life for shaping your life in the past decade. Not everyone appreciates the role of women in their lives. You and your wife are lucky to have each other as soul mates and of course a cute daughter as a blessing in your lives. Best wishes for the new decade !!

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  17. At last someone openly acknowledges the importance and influence women can have in ones life. And you have been very open about it. Really happy that you cane out of your bad phase with wife's full support and strong presence. Enjoy your time with the best little girl in your life now.

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  18. I am happy for you for coming out of desulutional disorder. All the best and trust me you are very lucky to have a wife like that

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  19. I really liked the theme of this post as I interact many male friends of mine who don't respect women. I appreciate your thinking and this post was beautiful, subtle. I enjoyed reading it. Best wishes for ur daughter.

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  20. Its good to read you gave your wife the respect she deserves. She is your rock and she has gone through as much as you have and kudos to her brining you out of your delusional phase.

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  21. This is such a beautiful and heartfelt tribute to the women in your life. Enjoyed reading it. Daughters are indeed Daddy's princesses. Wishing the new decade makes the bond only stronger.

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  22. Ah! An absolutely fresh take than the cliche and predictable choice of women, people normally write about. Honestly I was expecting Mother Teresa, Michelle Obama etc, the daughter was a cliche though. Daughters sure have the father twisted around their pinky fingers😊

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  23. an eventful decade u have had... glad u enjoyed every bit of it... congratulations for having a wonderful wife by your side. stay blessed.

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  24. What a wonderful take on the decade. I liked the fact that you did not slip into cliches while writing about women in your life. Having a partner who stayed by your side in your darkest hour is a blessing. Loved the tone and theme of your post, found it candid and warm.
    Best wishes.
    Deepika

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  25. Good that you are appreciating women in your life . Your wife loves you but didn't she tie to a pole on your incident of women doing pole dances and that personal attention ??? Anyways well written

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    1. πŸ˜€ I told her in bits and pieces. Ensuring everytime that she had absorbed my truth as my prank to tease her

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  26. This is a candid post written in a straightforward manner. Your wife is your anchor and it's great to see you talk about it. Daughters are the sweetest little beings on earth (I'm one too for my parents :p ).
    Best wishes for the decade. May your bonds grow stronger.
    I wasn't much aware of delusional disorder. Thank you for talking about it.

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  27. Its true when they say that there is a women behind every man and so goes with successful women. though I understood most of your story, I wasn't really able to grasp the bit where you met the ladies before leaving USA. Anyways cheers to a new decade and love to Ayantika :)

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  28. It's difficult to be candid and you've done that. You're no introvert anymore. Cheers!! Enjoyed reading your post.

    Janaki(@beyond the familiar)

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  29. I was introduced to a very different viewpoint through your post..Loved the way you focused on your wife and especially your daughter..You were very honest in writing about your journey down the decade.. Best wishes for the future..

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  30. That's a a wonderful way to look at decade, liked the post and meeting the women who changed & shaped your life. Was not aware of delusional disorder but happy you came over it and your wifey stood by you. A sincere candid post.

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  32. Haha! What a fun and honest tribute to the special women in your life!

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  33. Appreciate your honesty. I like how how you have mentioned all the important women in your life. Good idea :)

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  34. It was good reading about the women who shaped your life. The relationship between a husband and wife and father and daughter is truly special.

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  35. Interesting to read about the women who shaped your life...now I want to write about the men who shaped my life ! ;)

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    1. Good thought to write about men 😊. Thanks for reading and liking my blog

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  36. A loving partner is more valuable than all the gold in the world. You're blessed to have a wife, who trusts you to and accepts your candidness with grace. Wishing you and her a lifetime of joy together!

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  37. What a beautiful and candid tribute to all women who shaped up your life. Loved reading it and it takes courage to be honest.

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  38. And that was a straight forward and a candid way of putting across your experiences in words
    And also you were upfront about the disorder you faced
    It takes courage to face and share and my wishes to your wife who stood by you.

    Pls take care
    And may you both along with your princess be always blessed with a happy life .

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  39. You have painted your post with different shades of life and how they change our way of looking at it. Happy to know about your sweet family. Daughters are precious...

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  40. It is really impressing that you had acknowledged the women's in your life with this post. it is really a unique response to prompt. I really like the way you had narrated your relationship with your wife and daughter. wishing you lots of success and happiness in new decade.

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  41. Life breathes through a woman, mother. Women continue to teach and nurture us.

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  42. That's a totally unique take on the prompt, acknowledging the women who shaped your life. I really liked your candid yet honest account of events. You are lucky to have such a lovely wife in your life. Wish you all the best for the new decade.

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  43. I would love to read your post on your daughter one day. They are the cutest. Hats off to your wife for all the courage and strength by which she stood along you.
    Wish you luck.

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    1. Thanks Geethica. Will surely let you know I complete my writing on Ayantika

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  44. Such a beautiful ode to the women in your life. I lived how you mentioned about your daughter and that moment you held her for the first time. Please do share whenever you start father daughter blog. I would love to read. Vartika

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  45. That's a great post for all the women in your life, especially about your daughter

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  46. Manisha - A beautiful ode to the women to made a difference in your life. It was candid and straight from heart. Wishing you an amazing next decade.

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  47. Woah.. I didn't expect your post to end that way! I wonder if your wife has read it, and if she has, I wonder what she has to say about the strip club experience?! Haha, all said and done, I admire your honesty- there are very few people who can lay themselves bare on the internet, to strangers, without the fear of being judged. Kudos!
    Noor Anand Chawla

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    1. Thanks Noor. My wife knows my strip club experience. Yes!!

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  48. I loved the idea of independant blog about father daughter bonding. Most of the times it is mommies who blog about their kids. πŸ˜ƒ

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  49. Women are important in your life and its nice to see a post on them. What I loved the most is your relationship with your daughter. Each father daughter relationship is unique and beautiful. You have faced some harrowing times but I am glad the tough days are over. Wishing you and your two beautiful ladies a great decade ahead.

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  50. Daughters and fathers have a special bond and it is reflected very well in your post. It was good to read post dedicated to women in your life.

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  51. A candid read. You are blessed with a strong partner and your father-daughter relationship is going to grow stronger with years. HAve a great decade ahead.

    ~Pragnya (www.lifewithmypenguin.com)

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  52. You have it all! Just let it stay that way. Keep appreciating the women and give them their due. And you will get yours.
    A different kind of a post! Good luck!

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  53. This was one of the most fun posts I have read on this blog hop. I hope you continue to remain motivated and inspired with the presence of women in your life. Hats off to your wife to help you come back from delusion disorder. Its takes courage to be away from your family and still stand strong to support your partner.
    I I hope she does not know about your last somemone ;)

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  54. Cant believe i read a post about girls controlling Amrendra's life :) This is one such Aww.. post for me. Simple yet touching. Hope your wife and girl will continue shaping you in coming years.

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  55. Such a pleasure to read about ur transition from being a boy to husband and then father. Your wife is surely a solid support beside you. And god has been kind to bring her and your daughter in your life.
    Best Wishes to you for happier decades in future

    #readbypreetispanorama

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